So, You Wanna Date an Indonesian Girl?
Whether you’re searching for a lover before your vacation in Bali or a professional playboy seeking to put a few new notches on your belt𑁋you’re in the right place.
Here’s a quick guide on dating Indonesian girls, where to find them, a glimpse of the dating culture, and a few warnings to any careless “Bules” (you know who you are).
Reasons for Dating an Indonesian Girl
Indonesian girls are gorgeous and can be easily seduced into joining you for a short time together or something more serious, such as marriage. Regardless of your goals, Indonesian girls are exotic, conservative, caring, and sweet.
Their personalities vary from an unbelievably fun firecracker to a shy and submissive sweetheart. Depending on the type of Indonesian girl you want to date, the best way to discover your preference is by getting out there and playing the game.
If you’re feeling nervous or unsure whether an Indonesian girl is right for you, here’s a list of reasons that might convince you:
- Skintones range from pure white to a creamy cappuccino color
- Many Indonesian girls are “smaller” or petite size
- They maintain their beauty and make it a priority to look hot
- For the right (white $$$) man, they’re fiercely loyal and just a tad bit possessive
- Their curiosity for sex makes your time in the bedroom a new adventure night after night
The fact that Indonesia is a blend of different ethnicities and local races makes finding an exotic partner to date or marry exciting. Also, if you’re into conservative girls with a slightly submissive side to them, you’re probably going to fall in love with an Indonesian beauty quite quickly.
Finding an Indonesian Girl to Date is Easy
If you’re a foreigner traveling or living in Indonesia, you’ll quickly see how easy it is to find and date an Indonesian girl.
To give you a crash course on the culture, Indonesia is a Muslim country. There are many rules and taboos to be aware of. However, humans are the same everywhere so the desires and experiences you enjoy back home are 100% being sought after and enjoyed in Indonesia as well.
Now, if you want to date the easiest Indonesian girl, focus on the lower-class. Lower-class Indonesian girls typically find foreigners more favorable because they seem to be rich and well-educated.
Obviously, not all foreigners are rich, especially backpackers and rugged travelers. However, this is something to be aware of when you’re dating Indonesian girls.
Another type of girl that’s easy to get is a Bule hunter (more on that here). You may think that she’s genuinely interested in you, however, her motives may be to secure a stable life for her self and her future offspring.
For the sake of generalization, let’s say that girls with this kind of mentality will have thoughts like this floating in their minds:
“If I marry that bule, I am going to be rich, my kids are going to be smart with light-skin, and they’re going to be wealthy𑁋just like the bule who’ll be making my babies.”
That’s a bit dark and depressing, right?
Well, this is just to give you a fair warning if you end up in a relationship for the wrong reasons (i.e. hooking up and casual sex) versus seeking a partner for life (i.e. ending up with a lying gold digger).
Ultimately, the fact that you’re foreigner going to Indonesia offers a competitive advantage in the dating game. You don’t have to do much to impress an Indonesian girl. Your white skin, the idea that you have lots of money, and the hope of having a stable future are enough.
But, let’s assume you’re here to enjoy a genuine date with an Indonesian girl, someone you want to meet with, travel with, and share an experience with. Whether this turns into a transactional activity or a romantic Cinderella story, that’s entirely up to you.
Where to Find Indonesian Girls
The first (and easiest) place to find Indonesian girls is online. In fact, using both dating sites and other online platforms, you can quickly match and line of dates before you arrive in Indonesia.
Here are a few free and best places to find Indonesian girls online:
Each of these platforms provide unlimited access to local girls while you’re in Indonesia. You’ll have to create a decent account with decent pictures to get started. Then, all you have to do next is to use your best online dating game.
Playboy Tips & Tricks:
Use your best-looking pictures. Since dating apps are often a superficial way to match and meet people, make yourself appear wealthy and use a filter to enhance your beauty. Hey! If the girls do it to fool you, so can you!
If you prefer playing an offline game, here are some of the best cities to meet open minded Indonesia girls:
- Jakarta – This metropolitan has more than 35 million people living here. If you can’t find a girl, you may want to become a monk.
- Surabaya – This is Indonesia’s second-biggest city and it’s a great place for foreigners who want to live and work. You’ll also find a higher percentage of Chinese-Indo girls (if that’s your thing).
- Bali – You’ll find an abundance of dateable Indonesian girls in Kuta, Seminyak, and Depensar. Just be sure you know the difference between a girl who wants a relationship and a girl who wants your money.
- Yogyakarta – If you’re looking for young, educated girls go here. This city has the most University students in Indonesia.
- Bandung – Here you’ll find many Sundanese girls. So, go to Bandung if exotic Indonesia girls get you excited.
Tips for Talking to Indonesian Girls
First of all, just like any good looking girl in the world, an attractive Indonesian girl knows she’s hot. She’ll have an inbox flooded with messages and have heard a number of cheesy pick lines to try and seduce her.
Be creative and kick things off with something more than “Hey, what’s up?” However, if you have no standards and you’re just looking to hookup, just swipe right on everything and that line will work just fine.
When you’re successful at grabbing an Indonesian girl’s attention (one that you’re excited about dating), here are a few conversational tips:
- Don’t talk about money. If you’re seeking a genuine dating experience with an Indonesian girl, don’t let your finances enter the conversation. You’ll quickly know whether or not the girl is interested in who you are versus the amount of money she can gain to support her.
- Compliment her lifestyle and hobbies. This is a standard for all dating conversations. Focus on the interests she has and explore what she loves to do.
- Dive into her hopes and dreams. Take it to the next level by exploring her passions and dreams. You never know what you might find and you could discover a future dream that could be shared and built together.
Sex in Indonesian Culture
The majority of Indonesian people get their sex education from pornography. Even though this is illegal, all they need is an active VPN and they have total access to sexual lessons, techniques, and misconceptions.
Because of this, contraceptions are often not used and you shouldn’t be surprised when your Indonesian girl wants you to slip it in without a condom. There’s a shame associated with sex in Indonesian and it makes buying an extremely awkward experience.
Indonesia is not very open-minded when it comes to topics about sex and sexuality. Instead, Indonesians are more inclined to joke about sexual matters privately while abiding by the social norms that are dictated by their religious overlords.
Sex is taboo in Indonesia. However, in places like Jakarta and Bali, their attitudes are more open and you’ll be more likely to find Indonesian girls interested in casual and short term relationships.
The moral of this section is: both promiscuity and sex before marriage is a sin. And, be sure to buy a big box of condoms and use them regularly.
Living with an Indonesian Girl
If you’ve been dating an Indonesian girl for a while there may come a time when either you, her, or both want to move in together. While moving in with a girlfriend may be acceptable where you’re from, there are a few nuances to consider in Indonesia.
In September 2019, Indonesia’s government nearly passed a law that would have made sex before marriage illegal. Protests erupted all over the country and the bill has been postponed to be reconsidered.
With the sexual climate under constant scrutiny and criticism by Islamic leaders, a sudden change to the law could put your dating situation at risk (or force you into marriage).
When it comes to living with your Indonesian girl, it’s not outright illegal to do this. Although, there have been incidents of police raids in poorer districts due to nosey, sex-deprived neighbors reporting “bad behavior.”
So, if you’re going to let your Indonesian girl move in, be sure you have a good understanding of the local customs and beliefs. As a rule of thumb, focus on finding an apartment or villa that’s discreet and located in a private area.
Don’t be cheap and consider “integrating into Indonesia” by living in a local kost for 375,000 IDR per month. However, if self-service is your thing, do this and enjoy having the ibu who owns the place that there are no girls allowed on the property after dark.
Ibu = Mother / Polite way of greeting a lady
Kost = Basically, a room for rent
Bule = European or caacasians (a.k.a. White People)
Marrying an Indonesian Girl
Don’t be surprised if the topic of marriage comes up a lot when you’re dating an Indonesian girl. There is a lot of pressure from parents and society to find a partner and get married. This is the expectation so that people can begin their sexual life as a full adult.
Now, if you’re considering marriage with an Indonesian girl, there are a bunch of factors to consider. From approval from parents to religious rules, these can either make or break a relationship.
According to Indonesian law, couples are supposed to submit documents stating their religion and inter-faith couples can bump into the occasional conflict by local authorities.
The easiest solution would be to take your Indonesian girl back to your country and get married there. It makes the process easier and under terms that might be more suitable to your beliefs and needs.
If you’re going to pop the big question to your Indonesian girl, do your homework. There is a lot of bureaucratic nonsense in Indonesia that can result in headaches and unwanted heartaches. So, whether you want a trophy wife with an exotic look or a stable partner that’ll support your life, be sure you’re in this relationship for the right reasons.
Watch Our for Bule Hunters
In the game of dating, some girls are a blessing while others are a curse. Depending on your goals and the game that you play, there’s a particular female creature you may (or may not) want to watch out for.
Bule hunters are Indonesian girls who have given up on dating and marrying their fellow people. They’ve either been cheated and abused or learned from others that a rich white man can be their ticket to freedom.
In fact, the sole objective of a bule hunter’s life is to find a potentially wealthy white male and screw them silly until they bear them a baby.
If you have any self-love, self-respect, and self-decency, try to avoid this kind of Indonesian girl. Dating them is going to be extremely miserable, especially if you get her pregnant.
Bule hunters typically treat their men good by providing unlimited sex and acting as a loyal house pet. However, their mindset is quite unhealthy and they’ll manipulate you into becoming their personal ATM machine if you’re a total idiot.
This is just the short version about but hunters and a comprehensive guide on detecting and deterring these kinds of girls can be found here.